industrial training

All this while I've been thinking..
Should i regret that i've rejected the National Cancer Research Institute's (cariff) offer? Thoughts have been playing and running wildly in my head.
After two weeks doing my industrial training in Miri GH, I have finally been able to adapt myself-- well, a little...

Miri GH has given me the opportunities to learn a lot of new things-- things i have not seen or heard before. But sometimes, it just keeps me wondering why i should learn all these things. They are just not related to the course that i am studying now. All the while in the hospital, I've been envious of the doctors working there. They are doing the job that I've always aimed for, the chance to cure people, the chance to be in the spotlight where you can be busy and running about, shouting into your caller saying that you are on your way to the OT. That kind of life is what I've always dreamt for.

But today, after watching a doctor doing bone marrow extraction on 2 patietns i change my mind.
No, it's not that i couldn't bear watching needles aand syringes. I've been into OT watching doctors performing ceasarean and brain surgery. But it's the patients' sufferings that brought a halt to my will-never-be-able-to-achieve-dream.

Both patients are about 13 or 14 years of age. It was really depressing, though watching them having their bone marrow extracted from them. It was painful---excruciatingly painful, from their shouts of agony and pain. That was unbearable.

It makes you think how fragile we human are. And makes me realise too, how important our health is. Working in a hospital, where a kid as small as 4 suffering from major illness leaves me depressed everytime i reach home.

Therefore, I am thankful for not achieving that dream...